Are We Choosing to Be Insulted?

Originally published July 2011

When someone assumes something inaccurate about our diabetes, why are we often insulted? Does their ignorance lash out on us or is there something else causing most of the pain?

I believe we choose to be insulted. I’ve done it a thousand times and have eventually recognized the pain always comes from a place of insecurity, shame, guilt, or anger inside of me. I’ve always struggled at not taking things too personally and being too sensitive. I can’t control being sensitive but I’m slowly learning that I can control how I react to things. While I’ve been plenty insulted over all sorts of things, I haven’t really been insulted much about my diabetes. For example, when people have come up to me and said, ‘Maybe if you quit sugar, you’ll be cured?’ I am for some reason not the least bit insulted. I assume their level of ignorance on diabetes by this type of comment and depending on my given state at the time, I may be frustrated with their ignorance. I am never insulted though. I mean, we’re all ignorant when it comes to something. When we wrong someone else without meaning to, do we want them to be insulted? I prefer to be kindly corrected and avoid the attitude or anger that a person might lash out at my mistake.

Anytime someone insults us, we should recognize that we don’t have to feel insulted if we choose not to. It’s hard, obviously, but it’s the empowered thing to do. And we’re empowered people, aren’t we? When someone insults us, we are reacting to what they did or said or think of us. Our reaction is what causes our being insulted. So if we have enough confidence in ourselves and in what we’re doing and thinking, we can just react with indifference or with care and concern for a negative or ignorant person. If we don’t have confidence in what we do or think, maybe we should spend time reflecting on whether what we do and think is right in the first place.

The DOC is fabulous but would be even more so if we could all find our place of confidence and stand strongly with that. We may have diabetes but, we’re not victims.